Could you, or some other experienced list keeper, please recommend software that will facilitate this? Specifically, I need to be able to list projects, then have the ability to break them down into doable pieces. It would be especially great to find a program that has a calendar feature.

Thank you, thank you,
Rebekah

p.s. I would advocate for keeping a separate grocery list under a magnet on the fridge. I created a checklist formatted grocery list years ago, so we usually have a well supplied cupboard. I keep a stack of copies under the utensils.

Thanks for the feedback and I use to do lists similar to yours everyday!

I’m not harping on motivation…ok I lied. I love the idea of the to-do list as self-regulation, but how does one go from a low self-regulating state to a higher one? I may misunderstand the behaviorist position here (if such a thing exists), but it seems applied behaviorists advocate reinforcement over punishment. That which give us what we want or lets us escape what we don’t want is more motivating than someone hitting us with a baseball bat, for example.
Take to-do lists. Let’s say that you recognize the value cognitively of the to-do list. Good. There is some awareness that using these lists is a positive step. Without the energy or motivation to use them, however, the idea never gets off the ground. If anybody just used the bulk of the ideas from this site, their lives would most likely improve substantially…but how do you get an individual who can’t muster up the energy to start and maintain the intervention behaviors, such as keeping a to-do list, off the couch to actually complete what is written on that list?
In order to build motivation, that takes motivation. From where does motivation arise?
(If that rambling mess makes sense, feel free to respond).

I AGREE THAT IF SOMEONE LACKS SELF-REGULATION, THIS ARTICLE IS NOT USEFUL; SR IS OFTEN PREREQUISITE FOR GETTING THINGS DONE.

BUT YOUR QUESTION OF HOW THAT SR ARISES, PARTICULARLY IN AN INDIVIDUAL WHO LACKS ANY SR, IS ANOTHER QUESTION ENTIRELY. WE CERTAINLY KNOW A BIT ABOUT ENVIRONMENTAL FACTORS THAT ENABLE AND INHIBIT SR, AND ABOUT SR-BUILDING INTERVENTIONS, WHICH KATHRYN SUMMARIZED SO BEAUTIFULLY ABOVE.

BUT I BELIEVE THAT THE RIGHT SR-ENHANCING STRATEGY VARIES TREMENDOUSLY BETWEEN INDIVIDUALS, AND THAT WE DON’T YET HAVE SUFFICIENCT RESEARCH TO REVEAL WHICH SR-ENHANCING TECHNIQUES WORK MOST EFFECTIVELY FOR WHOM. ASK ME AGAIN IN A DECADE, MAYBE SOMEBODY WILL HAVE FIGURED IT OUT

{edit comment}Kathryn Britton, on September 29th, 2007 at 11:42 am, said:
Jordan,
I live with the king of to-do lists. He has a spreadsheet that is his to-do list template. It includes things that need to be done daily, weekly, monthly, seasonally, and long-term projects that he wants to get done sometime in his life. The spreadsheet is the current manifestation of something he’s been doing as long as I’ve known him. The template used to be a dog-eared marble-covered notebook.
Every week he uses the template to make this week’s to-do list. He has the long-term items sorted by deadline (if any) and priority. He sorts the monthly list to make this month’s items come out on top. He includes the daily tasks that may seem so habitual, why even write them down. After he creates this week’s list, he prints it out and puts it on a clipboard. Then he reviews it daily to pick out items for the day’s list. If he finds himself doing something that is not on the to-do list (with other family members as chaos factors, this is inevitable), he writes them down on this week’s list. Before creating next week’s list, he considers whether those items should be incorporated into the template.
My observation is that the to-do list works exactly as you describe. When he is doing something, he has the confidence that he is doing the highest priority task that is ready to run. So he doesn’t spend time worrying about whether he is doing the right thing. He also gives himself the pleasure of checking off all the daily tasks that most people treat as table stakes. They are worth doing and worth celebrating completion.

WOW, THAT’S VERY COOL. I REALLY LIKE THIS IDEA!

I don’t manage to-do lists nearly as well, but I’m getting much better at catching myself starting to leave one half-done task to do another and telling myself, “Finish one thing at a time.” I frequently remind myself of a passage I read in a book by Thich Nhat Hanh about washing the dishes for the sake of washing the dishes.
I can certainly see how to-do lists can help one stay in the present moment without regret and without borrowing trouble. I wonder if they couldn’t also be a tool for considering different ways and times to do certain tasks in order to make them more satisfying. Here’s a brief reflection on that topic in my blog: http://theanocoaching.wordpress.com/2007/08/24/changing-the-time-of-day/

I AGREE WITH YOU THAT BEING AWARE OF HOW OUR ENERGY LEVELS WAX AND WANE CAN BE HELPFUL; I ALWAYS STUDY RIGHT AFTER RUNNING. OTHERS WILL LIKELY FIND DIFFERENT ENERGY PATTERNS THAT THEY CAN USE TO MAKE THE TASKS MORE SATISFYING/EFFICIENT.

I await your further thoughts with great interest.
Kathryn

{edit comment}Faculties, on September 29th, 2007 at 11:13 am, said:
I think the time a to-do list doesn’t cultivate mindfulness is when it puts pressure on you to get the things done. So you’re never in the moment, but always thinking, “How fast can I get this checked off? What’s next on the list?” I think it helps to schedule things for specific times - “Pay bills before noon; call Jason tomorrow.” Then you can let the items go, knowing they’re scheduled and will get done. (This depends on building a healthy habit of getting them done when it’s time.) I use “backpack,” which has multiple pages, so that I can only see today’s to-do list, not the full huge array of things waiting to be done. It would be a nice exercise to put only one thing on the to-do list for a certain day. “Wash dishes mindfullly,” or whatever. Then you’re done. Being able to disregard tomorrow’s waiting to-do list is a good mindfulness challenge.

I AGREE THAT WE NEED TO GUARD AGAINST AN OVERRIDING SENSE OF URGENCY THAT CAN INHIBIT MINDFULNESS (NOT TO MENTION PRODUCTIVITY). HOWEVER, MANY PEOPLE ARE ABLE TO MOVE THROUGH TASKS QUICKLY WITHOUT SACRIFICING MINDFULNESS. SOMETIMES A SENSE OF URGENCY DOES INDEED INHIBIT MINDFULNESS, AS YOU HAVE DESCRIBED, BUT I BELIEVE THAT URGENCY AND MINDFULNESS ARE NOT MUTUALLY EXCLUSIVE. MANY PEOPLE ARE ABLE TO BE PRESENT, LIVING IN THE MOMENT, AND YET BE MOVING VERY QUICKLY.

A CARDIOLOGIST I ONCE WORKED WITH MENTIONED THAT IT IS IMPORTANT FOR HIM TO BE MINDFUL WHILE PRACTICING MEDICINE, BUT HE ALSO WANTED TO GET HOME AT A DECENT HOUR TO SPEND TIME WITH HIS FAMILY EACH NIGHT (THE IMPLICATION BEING THAT THE 2 ARE INCOMPATIBLE)

I BELIEVE (AND HAVE SPOKEN WITH PEOPLE) WHO ARE DISUADED FROM MINDFULNESS PRACTICES BY A COMMON MISPERCEPTION THAT YOU CAN’T BE MINDFUL AND QUICK AT THE SAME TIME. YET MANY PEOPLE WHO MUST WORK VERY QUICKLY (SUCH AS HEALTHCARE PROVIDERS), HAVE MANAGED TO MASTER THIS BALANCE. I WOULD LOVE TO SEE THIS MYTH ADDRESSED MORE OFTEN AND MORE THOROUGHLY IN MINDFULNESS TRAININGS.

I REALLY LIKE YOUR IDEA OF PUTTING JUST ONE MINDFUL ITEM ON THE TO-DO LIST EACH DAY. MAYBE YOU COULD TRY IT AND REPORT BACK?

BE WELL,
JORDAN

Sherri,

Please see my responses to your comments below, in CAPS.

Be well,
Jordan

Hi, Jordan-
This got me thinking!

Since the list is in a spreadsheet, is there a way to sort into mindfulness-enhancing categories that transcend prioritizing?

YES, YOU CAN DEFINITELY DO THIS! PERSONALLY, I HAVE MANY SUCH CATEGORIES THAT TRANSCEND PRIORITIZING AND I COULD TALK ABOUT THEM FOR HOURS. IF YOU’RE INTERESTED, I’D BE HAPPY TO SHARE MY CATEGORIES AND DISCUSS THEM WITH YOU IN MORE DETAIL - JUST LET ME KNOW.

In reality some things on the to-do list bubble to the top. And non-list life happens, in the form of emergencies and fabulous opportunities.

YES, THINGS OFTEN “BUBBLE” TO THE TOP OF OUR TO-DO LISTS, AND THIS IS ONE OF THE REASONS THAT I BELIEVE IT’S SO IMPORTANT TO GET EVERYTHING POSSIBLE ONTO THE TO-DO LIST IN THE FIRST PLACE. TOO OFTEN, WHAT WE THINK OF AS “BUBBLING” ARE ACTUALLY THINGS THAT ARE BEING THRUST TO THE TOP OF THE TO-DO LIST WITHOUT US FIRST CONSIDERING WHETHER THEY REALLY NEED OR DESERVE TO BE PLACED AT THE TOP. MANY PEOPLE (INCLUDING MYSELF) HAVE MADE THE MISTAKE OF LETTING THINGS THAT ARE URGENT BUT NOT NECESSARILY IMPORTANT BUBBLE TO THE TOP OF THEIR LISTS.

Some things on the list are steps toward the same goal. Maybe these items appear at first to be unrelated. Can the list be a way of connecting these wayward children of the same family?

YES, A LIST CAN BE BUILT TO GROUP ITEMS THAT ARE PART OF THE SAME GOAL OR PROJECT, AND THIS CAN BE A VERY HELPFUL TOOL. MANY SOFTWARE PROGRAMS ARE ABLE TO DO THIS QUICKLY AND EASILY, OR CAN ALSO DO IT ON PAPER OR IN A SIMPLE TEXT FILE.

I find that my clients who do not get things “off the list” can use some PP techniques to figure out why and to become more mindful (Langer version) of this tendency in the future.
For instance, sometimes we combine strengths in ways that make them no longer in the service of our goals. According to one college student client who has love of learning and self-regulation at the bottom of her VIA, Humor and Perspective (her #1 and #2) can result in her telling herself that she will get to something eventually and laughing it off for now. Using your strengths in new ways and in new combinations could be one way to deal with what someone is not getting done. It is helping this client.

IDENTIFYING AND USING OUR STRENGTHS CAN BE INVALUABLE. FOR EXAMPLE, I HAVE A STRONG LOVE OF LEARNING. I RECENTLY BEGAN APPLYING THIS STRENGTH TO IMPROVE MY ANATOMY STUDIES. I PUNCTUATE LONG STUDY SESSIONS WITH OCCASIONAL PERIODS IN WHICH I CONSIDER, IN SOME DEPTH, THE EVOLUTIONARY EXPLANATIONS FOR THE STRUCTURES I’M LEARNING ABOUT. THIS HELPS KEEP ME ENGAGED, AND THUS MORE LIKELY TO GET THROUGH THIS ITEM ON MY LIST EFFICIENTLY AND EFFECTIVELY. I COULD ELABORATE MUCH MORE IF YOU’RE INTERESTED.

I think it is a lovely day and you might consider going out for a run or a hike. Is spontaneity on the list?

YES! ALTHOUGH CREATING AND ADHERING TO TO-DO LISTS IS IMPORTANT, SPONTANEITY IS INVALUABLE.

I also wonder whether you would find that you’d be distracted by all 600 things if you did not let some of them get on the list in the first place.

YES, I CERTAINLY MIGHT BE LESS DISTRACTED IF I DECIDED THAT SOME THINGS REALLY AREN’T EVEN WORTH PUTTING ON THE LIST. THIS ISSUE, HOWEVER, IS ADDRESSED IN A DOWNSTREAM STEP OF MY WORKFLOW THAT I’D BE HAPPY TO DISCUSS IF YOU’RE INTERESTED.

THANKS SO MUCH FOR YOUR INSIGHTFUL COMMENTS!

WE MISSED YOU AT THE CONFERENCE THIS YEAR. HOPE I’LL HAVE AN OPPORTUNITY TO SEE YOU AGAIN SOON. :

But this depends on the interpretation one brings to the list and to ones obligations. In the context of To Dos, perspective and mental space are blown away if control is absent. For example, if you are burdened by the number and character of your obligations, then To Do lists only emphasize this — so that when you work with them you feel like you are face-to-face with the distilled essence of your burdens. Or: To Dos can be used as attempts to cope with a situation that you are convinced is uncontrollable — perhaps because the elements on the list are distasteful, or perhaps because you characteristically don’t act assertively over them.

In a different but related sense, To Dos can even be a defense mechanism or a substitute for doing. I suggest that if you perceive your obligations as uncontrollable, but you nonetheless have to act, building To Do lists can be a way to buffer yourself from responsibilities rather than engaging them. Then any work with your To Dos will just lead to anxiety.

Not only the list itself, but how you handle the list is also important — how you maintain it and what you normally do when you consult it. All of these can evoke a sense of control, personal reflection and integration, which connect with perspective / awareness. Approached this way, To Dos promote the control-based whole-ism that promotes mindfulness. But: improper handling can remind you of past failures or uncontrolled, evasive policies, and so trigger anxiety. You can even view the To Do list as new, additional work, unrelated to your actual obligations. Then the listing becomes another detailed job, not a means to an end.

If the framing and policy you bring to your To Dos is one of control, you have the groundwork for moving into mindfulness.

I thoroughly savored your responses to my motivation question.

Let me give you some reflection on your ideas, which I loved loved loved. First, as for the public commitment Senia mentioned, I have had some unusual experiences with public commitments. When I commit publicly, I often find my workout partners or groups too demanding. Often I feel like vomiting after working out with them b/c I push myself to compete. The golden mean is tough to find. The other groups I’ve been with have seemed slow and snoozerlicious. The pace is very sedate and I find myself daydreaming and relaxed…at the expense of getting in shape. Maybe I’ve burned 100 calories after an hour of pleasantish plodding. As you know, 100 calories is like one apple. Yes, the public commitment is fairly effective in all at keeping to a set schedule and actually completing some kind of exercise.

Great. Now, the private commitment in a journal have overall been only slightly effective due to its limited use. I find myself unable to stick with it, even with concrete rewards such as money in a jar for keeping the journal. The biggest thing here is distractibility. I see a better way to track something or different exercises I want to try and then I forgot to do the journals. Life can get hectic!

The bottom line here is that I really hate to exercise (especially cardio), but I need to do it for my health and family. Love the results, despise the physical and time consuming punishment getting there.

I’ve read Baumeister and agree with the muscle metaphor. I do put goals into behavioral, SMART formats and promptly ignore (when energy levels are low) or forget them within a couple of days. Others set goals for me, but I rail against them. I’m big on self-determination.

Just chatting with you is helpful, BTW. You miracle workers, you. Clearly the commitment piece is lacking.

So here’s what I find in the manual of the sanities (Character Strengths and Virtues) on self-regulation:

Enabling and inhibiting factors
1) Being aware of self regulation as behaving like a muscle as per Baumeister. This means it both gets tired (hence weaker) in specific situations with use AND it gets stronger overall with use. I think I wrote about that earlier this year because I think it’s a very interesting viewpoint.

2) Recognize that it only goes so far in a particular situation. So if you are straining to meet a deadline or avoiding a mighty temptation, don’t ding yourself if you can’t keep yourself from picking up a candy bar.

3) Monitor yourself. CSV says that failures in self-monitoring tend to precipitate failures in self-regulation partly because you lose track of the distance between current state and goal state.

4) Have goals. If you can’t figure out your own, get someone else to set them for you. Latham’s research shows that goals that originate from others are also effective.

5) Put behavioral intentions into words. Often these intensions are expressed conditionally — I think in order to make it easier to imagine meeting the intention. “When I’m in a restaurant, I’ll only order salad.”

Here’s one I’ve added:

6) Give yourself credit for past evidence of self-regulation. You finished college, right? Could you have done that without self-regulation? Are there other big ways that you show self-regulation that get blocked out of view by smaller scale self-regulation failures?

You really might find the chapter on self-regulation helpful.

Kathryn